Planes, Phones, and Spiders

Have you ever had one of those weeks where life changes a bit? Where your view of life is altered and you realize that you will never look at life the same again? You know where those weeks where you are just going about your business and bam something happens that throws you of course a bit? I think I can get comfortable with life and put safety nets in place. I find safety nets much easier than actually depending on God alone. In my defense, I often fool even myself. I make it appear as though I am being wise and Godly and don't realize that I am putting my hope in things rather than God. So, this week God got a hold of me. As I look back at all that has happened and how different I feel compared to this time last week, I am in a bit of shock. However, it has been a full week so prepare yourself for a bit of a long entry. Maybe, go get a cup of tea, a bag of popcorn, or just some chocolate to help you get through the long entry that is about to begin.

This past week, we had a week long seminar for the teachers from all five of the Imara schools. WOW! God did so much, I will have to share more about that at another time but if I shared that at this time as well, this would quickly become a short novella. As is the case with most seminars, especially here, the first morning is a bit nuts as you run here and there getting all the last minute things together, making sure so and so knows about the thingabob and the other so and so has gotten the whatchamacallit. Needless to say, by lunch time I was bit tired. As we began the session after lunch, I felt like I could finally sit back and enjoy and learn. However, soon after started my foot felt a little strange. When I looked down, it had gotten a bit swollen. Since my ankle sprain several months ago, every once in a while my ankly swells up a bit so I didn't think much of it until I realized that it was the wrong foot. I just love it when I do stuff like that. I continued on but started feeling a bit weird. Quickly, the size of my foot increased significantly and feeling a bit weird grew to feeling dizzy with chestpains. I felt like waiting was no longer the wise choice and going to the doctor might be a good idea.

However, when I got to the doctor he barely acknowledged what I was going through and had me get some bloodwork done and then come back in three hours. I thought he was concerned and wanted to see if my condition was getting worse or better. I was wrong. He just had something else to do. After coming back three hours later and waiting an hour and a half, I learned that he had tested me for malaria, which of course I did not have, and then gave me cipro which is a medicine to kill bacteria when you have a stomach bug. Needless to say, I broke down. That moment was one that I felt the most fear. I felt like there was no one I could trust or depend on that knew what they were doing. Everything is malaria here. Despite the clear evidence of bites on my legs that were hard and hot and the huge size of my lower leg, I got tested for malaria. At that moment, I just sat and realized that I had nothing but God. I had absolutely no control. There was nothing that I could do. My mom called the medical insurace company I use and they asked what country Tanzania is in, so I felt like their knowledge of these things might be slightly limited. Honestly, I cannot think of a time when I felt more scared. Any safety net that doctors provide was completely gone.

Next up on the list, my finances. Because of several crazy situations, my savings account went from healthy to zero. I had been trying to be responsible with my money and make wise decisions. Having a savings account definitely provided a sense of security in case of emergencies and now that is gone completely. A bit scary but once again nothing I can do. The situation is completely out of my control and I have to depend on God.

The finale of this week was a bit of a shock to my system as well. After finishing the seminar on Friday, I headed down to Dar es Salaam for a meeting on Saturday. Before the meeting began, I decided to go for a run. Even though it was quite early, about 7am, lots of people were out. Since I am a bit of a slow runner, well let's be honest, I am more of a shuffler that looks like I am a bit haggard while I run, I prefer for the crowd to not be so big. So, I decided to head towards to beach. As I was on the rocky part making my way to the sand, a man approached me. He picked up large rock and said give me your phone or I will kill you. I was in shock. Was he actually serious? Was I really being robbed? I did not want to give up my phone. This past week there had been multiple issues with it that made me wonder if I should just purchase another one, but with my current financial situation, I felt like I could not do it. So, he was not going to get my phone without a fight. And, fight we did. He struggled to get my phone as I asked him why? I told him that God was here. God knows what he is doing. The struggle continued for a while and then he picked up a broken bottle. Even though I screamed a couple of times, everyone kept on with what they are doing and ignored the situation. Then another man came up. He pulled a knife. At this point, I decided to give up the struggle. However, I wanted my sim card. Having to change my phone number and find all my numbers seemed too much. After being a bit too difficult, they finally conceded but then also took my watch. It was a bit surreal to realize that one guy was holding me with a knife while the other guy took my phone and watch. As they walked away, I told them that God still loved them. They just stared at me like I was crazy. Now, I felt like even my life was not secure. You never know what is going to happen. God is always at work and clearly was protecting me.

On the plane ride home, the whole plane was praying because it was such a scary ride. We had some significant free fall, some large bumps, and did some sliding around. As all of this was happening, I couln't help but think that maybe this past week God was preparing me for what might happen. However, we landed safely.

As I sat in my living room on Sunday night, I was a bit overwhelmed by all that occured in one week and all that God had done. I felt like God used planes, phones, and spiders to rip away any safety net and show me that I really can depend on Him alone. I feel a bit exposed and little unsure but very aware of God's presence.

This morning, one of my favorite passages of scripture became a little more real.

Isaiah 43: 1-2

"Do not fear, I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not overcome you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Saviour."