Home for the Holidays

To say that it is good to be home for the holidays, is a gross understatement.  There is nothing like mom's home cooked food and playing games with my dad. Getting to sit by the fire and drink hot cocoa is one of my absolute favorite things in the world. I am very happy to be home.  However, the weird thing is that this does not completely feel like home anymore.  I just don't think that you get to go to Tanzania and come back the same.  Seeing children want nothing more than to hold your hand and giggle with delight is such a treasure. It is unbelievable to be a part of something bigger than yourself; it puts things in perspective. I have been so blessed to have the opportunity to go to Africa. God is changing lives (mostly mine, probably). God is a God of hope and purpose and peace and love. When you have nothing else, you see it much more clearly. I have learned so much from my African brothers and sisters. I love them. I miss them. 

As I process through the robbery and everything, God is so gracious and good. I know that everything is going to be okay. I know that I am going to get through all of this. My faith in God is stronger now because of all of this. How could it not be after all that I have seen. God really is who He claims to be.  God's tender mercy and love are real, it is not just some fairy tale that we tell to make ourselves feel better. I am so happy to be at home with my friends and family but I am happy that I will be going back to Tanzania to be with my other friends and family again as well. 

Back in the Saddle again

I have learned that life goes on, and that it is important to take things one day at a time. I have continued to be amazed at the overwhelming amount of people that are praying for me. The first week after the robbery, I was scheduled to teach at the teachers college and help teach at a seminar for one of the schools with around 45 teachers.  One day,  I was sharing about how to treat and teach children differently in the light of the fact that they are created by God. We talked about how being a Christian affects how we teach the material and how we relate and care for the children. It was an exciting time with them. Of course, the poor teachers had to listen to most of the examples be about math. I still don't really understand why everyone does not love math. There is nothing like a really challenging math problem and getting right. What a feeling of accomplishment, yeah, I did it! Furthermore, our understanding of math helps to see more of God's character. Before you call a mental health professional for me, let me explain! I am a total math nerd, but it really is unbelievable.  The more we understand about infinity and that we can never stop counting, the more we can start to have a glimpse of who God is. He is infinite, never ending. We cannot imagine how big God is.  He can hold the entire universe in the palm of His hand. Then, think of the infinitesimal, things that are microscopic that cannot be seen with the naked eye. God is a God of precision and accuracy. He created order and the laws of the universe.  God knows the hairs on our head. Nothing is too small for Him because He is a tender and loving God. Isn't that amazing! I would keep on going but I fear that I might put many of you to sleep. =)

The point is that I love the opportunity to open up children's minds to who God is and help create a love for learning.  We need to teach in such a way that we feed their curiousity, and their awe and wonder.  There is nothing like seeing a child's face light up with excitement as he learns something new that blows him away.  So, part of our responsibility is to help train the teachers in how to do it and even teach them importance of doing it. I really enjoyed my time at the seminar. Also, it has been good to be back at the teachers college again. I love the teachers there so much and thrilled with how much they have grown since I first met them. It will be wonderful when they start at our schools this January. 

Even though there have been so many great moments, there have been hard moments as well. I find that I am not able to handle as much. I feel less motivated.  I have a desire to withdraw at times. I have extreme reactions to things that do not usually affect me. I feel all over the place emotionally.  I know this is normal and I need time so I am just trying to hang on.  I have decided to go home for the holidays, and I can hardly wait I am so excited.  However, just making that decision was incredibly difficult.  I am usually a quick decision maker that is not afraid to take risks. For the time being, that is gone.  I think it is going to take a while to get back to normal.