All morning I have been singing, "Leaving on a jet plane, don't know when I will be back again." Well, let me be honest, singing and even dancing a little. You can't help but tap your feet and move your head back and forth again. I was always a bit disappointed that I never made it to the big time with my moves. During my early teen years, I practiced a lot in front of my mirror. But, I digress. The point is that I am leaving today to go back to Tanzania. Talk about emotional overload. I feel like a giant dumptruck has backed up and dumped a load on top of me and I am buried somewhere underneath and cannot get out.
At times during my short time back in the States, I have felt a little like Lucy from "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe." She discovered the amazing world filled with adventure, excitement, and so many new and wonderful people and things to experience. When she got back, it was like she had never left. For the people back home, it had only been a few seconds. Even though things have changed here, it still feels like I never left. It was almost like I never went to Tanzania and it had only been a few seconds. I found it so easy to pick back up where I left off with my old life. It makes the other world not seem real. However, it was real. I am excited to go back but really sad to leave. My time at home has been amazing, refreshing, encouraging, fun, and just plain good. But, way too short. I have not seen all the people that I wanted to and the ones that I did, I did not see enough. I did lots of fun things but never made it to Stone Mountain or even went for a bike ride. I feel not ready to leave. I want to stay.
Someone recently asked me what I miss about America and what do I not miss. The list was quite long for the things that I miss from mint chocolate chip ice cream to turkey sandwiches and smooth roads and good conversations with friends. However, I could not think of anything that I don't miss. I actually really love America. I love having seasons, especially the fall and not just because of football. I love the relationships I have with people here and the familiarity of life long friends and family. Goodness, I am going to miss my three little nieces. Honestly, I would prefer to stay. I am not living in Tanzania because I do not like America or because it is better. I am not leaving everyone that I love to have a great vacation. Living there is not a 24/7 emotional or spiritual high. It is life, just like here with good days and bad days. The only reason I am going to Tanzania is because I know that is where God wants me to be and I know that He is good and trustworthy. So, as I go back and feel so much uncertainty about so many things, I am simply clinging to Him.
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2 comments:
Meagan,
He who began the good work in you will bring it to pass. Eyes had not seen nor ears have heard what God has in store for you who love Him. Ask me and I will give you Tanzania as an inheritance and the ends of the earth as your possession, for greater is He who is in you that he who is in the world. He has engraved you on the palm of His hand and He will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go, He will counsel you and watch over you. He will never let go of you.
Please, give my greetings to Jones, Paul & Gidori when you get to see them and tell them that I am looking forward to spending time with them next year.
Hakuna Mungu Kama Wewe Hakuna Kabasi
Unanguvu (in Him)
Cheka... Mungu ana kupenda!!!!
Kwaheri
Praying for you.
Megs,
Sooooo wonderful to spend time with you when you were in Atlanta. It was like we were kickin’ it old school for a little bit - Steve's b-day dinner, photos with the girls, Starbucks, your Perimeter presentation (you were fabulous!), shopping, Canoe, spending the night, walking in the rain (well, a short walk). Wow - we crammed a lot in for a short time. Miss you already!
Keep on serving the Lord with all you have and I will see you in a short while.
Love You,
Jyn
P.S. We’re back from Morocco and have more updates on our blog. Did I tell you that after God redirected us from Tanzania to Morocco that many people responded, “Oh – I thought you were going to Africa.” Ummmm, yeah.
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