Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Dog people vs. Cat People

Yes, the century long battle continues between the sweet, loving, and loyal group of dog lovers vs. the snobby, too good for you, leave me alone group of cat people. I am sure it is impossible at this point to tell which group I belong to. I will let the suspense continue for a little while longer. =) Either way, we are all pet lovers. Do you know what it is about having a pet that makes us happy? Why do kids beg and plead to get one? For me, having a dog was so much fun. It was great to have my little guy to go for walks with and play with and snuggle with. But then, one morning I awoke to weird sounds only to discover that my dog was having a grand mal seizure that lasted about 5 minutes. I thought he was dying. I just cried and held him. Throughout the next year, my little Matty had many more seizures. Because he had grand mal cluster seizures, I had to take him to the vet emergency clinic often. The amount of money that I spent on my dog was definitely significant. Eventually, they became so frequent and severe that too much damage had been done and he needed to be put down. I loved my dog.

This morning when I got online, one of the news headlines was about wheelchairs for pets. As I looked at the cute little dog in his wheelchair, I just started to cry. It came out of nowhere. I wasn't expecting it. However, I wasn't crying because of the dog, I was crying because of the people that I see here. I was crying because of all the people I see crippled, many of whom do not even have wheelchairs and if they do they are nothing like what we have in the States. I am not sure what to do with the things that I see everyday. How do I help? How do I not help? How do I not hurt for these people that I see limping along who have to walk miles just to get water? How does my heart not break for people that have little to no value in their society and are cast offs? But, how do I live in a perpetual state of brokenness? In it is not every once in a while that I see these things, it is every day.

As Julia and I were driving yesterday, she told me the story of a woman that was just heartbreaking that she saw earlier. I think the man in the wheelchair along the side of the road whose legs were size of a tiny tree branch might have been what reminded her of that woman but I am not sure. I couldn't help but think that we have barely begun to scratch the surface of the despair and poverty in this country and really all over.

Honestly, sometimes it is too much for me. I just want to run away and hide and forget about all the things that I have seen. I just want to go home and go back to my old life and let these people just be people that I see occassionally on the news or that I hear stories about rather than real people that I know. But I know I can't...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

right there with ya sista... can barely look at the people who wear shoes on their hands as they crawl on the ground downtown. met 2 young girls living on the street and when i asked if men sleep with them, they just giggled and denied it. what 13 year old wouldn't gasp if i asked them that! but they knew what i was talking about. and then as i pay at the grocery store, the man behind me had a huge wad of bills to pay for something like a fridge, and i thought to myself, that he probably saved for a really long time to make that purchase, and to me, i could spend that money in a month... i almost started crying, and i was so ashamed of myself... it is going to be hard to go back... alida